A lot of people have a lot of misconceptions about love and money which have been developed from a very young age. Many girls and women these days still believe that they need to man to solve all their emotional and financial problems – the reality is couples need to work together to make, manage and invest their money. When the honeymoon phase is over, things get real and as partner in the relationship it is detrimental for the survival of the union for couples to manage their finances together.
Here are the top 3 mistakes that couples make when navigating through marriage:
1 Not Discussing Money
People don’t just have conversations about money and they don’t know where they stand or where their partners stand. So one of the things that have to happen is that you have to know what you own and what you owe, both of you, and make decisions going forward. When couples fail to openly talk about money, it develops into a habit which is then passed on to their children. Silence brings about miscommunication, misunderstandings and a lot hurt feelings as money sometimes is used by spouses to express love, enforce control, humiliate or even punish. An open environment where money is discussed openly is not something that can easily be achieved however, nothing good comes easy and as such gift your relationship with an open safe places to discuss pertinent financial matters.
2 Not having a financial advisor or meeting one alone
We understand that life can get in the way of getting some tasks done but there are some things, just like other very important things, that require time out of your busy schedule. Invest in some time to make important decisions about money and seek advice from professionals to help you go along. Working with an advisor will give you a chance to talk about money openly and honestly, discuss and resolve financial matters and make decisions about the future of the family. Moreover, it will help you avoid some of the biggest money mistakes and keep the love alive.
3 Playing the financial damsel
The trend in our society is women (and sometimes men) seeking out partners who can adequately sustain them both emotionally and financially. Waiting to be financially rescued is some risky business because what happens when your partner suddenly dies or decides to leave you? A man/woman cannot embody your financial plan. You cannot afford to be financially indifferent and waiting for your partner to do everything. Marriage is about team work – particularly in today’s day and age you cannot afford to take a back seat. We must leave behind all the Cinderella tale nonsense we learned as children, take responsibility and do it now!
It is important to note that, most marriages do not have money problems; they simply have a communication problem. Therefore, in the same breath as a couple you discuss your children’s welfare; money too should be among the list of things discussed. If you work together towards shared financial goals, you can avoid not only breaking your wallet and purses but also, your love when you say things that you will regret later.